dear hadley

Dear Hadley,

I'm embarrassed that I haven't kept up with my monthly letters to you. It's not that I haven't been inspired, because little lady, you inspire me daily. It's that life is busy!! But tonight, I feel inspired.

My sweet girl, you are quickly rounding the "four year-old" corner at the speed of a professional ball player. I can't believe it... I have an (almost) four year-old.  You are so grown-up and smart. I look at you and marvel... Is it possible that I grew you, birthed you and manage to not only keep you alive, but help mold you into this gorgeous little person?

The other evening we were all outside so you and your sister could ride bikes. You had on your Tinker Bell helmet, flip flops, a cute little skirt and sweatshirt. You were smacking on gum and zooming around corners on your big girl bike like it was no ones business. I looked at your dad and said "I can't believe we have a child who is doing this." And I can't.

Just last week you finished your first year of preschool. Your development leaped... You draw pictures now and almost write your name. You have one more year of preschool, but I think you are anxious for kindergarten - today you had me drive you by the school you will go to when the time comes.

You have made wonderful little friends, both in school and out, who you love spending time with. You have a little friend who comes over once a week (and you go to her house once a week) and you two hole up in your bedroom and spend two hours in your own little world. I have vivid memories of doing this with my friends and I'm in awe that you are old enough to do it too.

Now let's talk about swimming! You are starting to swim like you ride your bike. You have become quite comfortable in the pool and today I watched you dunk yourself underwater in the shallow end. Not by accident, but on purpose by all meanings of the word. You scoop and kick and when your floaties are on, watch out! I think you might be pretty close to being an independent swimmer by the end of the summer.

You and I are headed on a trip to San Francisco in a couple of weeks. No daddy. No sister. Just the two of us. And I am beyond excited. You make a wonderful travel companion and I think you will really enjoy seeing the beautiful city you are from. Plus, I get to show off my beautiful girl to my friends :)

My love, this letter is written quite poorly, but my thoughts poured out a bit. I love you more than words can describe.

I love you to pieces,
Momma

mad

Today Hadley made me mad. She was in a typical, almost four year-old, push your buttons mode. Not listening, doing exactly opposite of what I asked her not to do. "Hadley, crayons are for paper" and two minutes later I catch her coloring on the table top and the top of their push car. "Hadley, stay inside the fenced area (in our backyard)" and where do I find her? On the other side of the fence.

I got mad.

I got so mad that I gave their little table and chair set away. I had it. I have asked countless times not to color on things other than their drawing paper, none the less, it happened. And my almost four year-old knew better. If my two year-old had done this, I probably wouldn't have been as livid.

Following this extravaganza, Hadley decided she needed some privacy in the bathroom - fair enough - but she slammed the door in her sisters face before she had the chance to get her hand out of the door. This set me off too.

And I yelled.

Then I cried.

I don't like being mad. It's not fair that I was mad at my daughter who was doing exactly what she should be doing at this age. But I was mad. Pissed.

And so I apologized. For being mad and yelling. But I explained what the problem was.

But, I don't like being mad.

epic

We are home from our family vacation in the Outer Banks of North Carolina. And I'm not going to lie... a little grudgingly. All of us enjoyed spending time with our extended family, many of whom my children have never met, some I haven't seen in 20+ years. We played together in the sand and the waves and the pool. We caught crabs, watched for dolphins and hollered when the flocks of pelicans flew over head. We hugged and laughed and cried. We celebrated those who are no longer with us and promised to not let 20+ years pass again. 

This is what it's about. Family. I am fortunate to have the family I do and feel blessed to be able to share that with my girls.

gussy sews inspiration workshop: shoes

(or lack there of...)

We are still playing in the sand in North Carolina.

These feet are of my little girls and my handsome nephew (the tiny feet).

I'm linking up with Gussy Sews :)

beep...

The Kite Chase

leave a message, we're on vacation!

We are at a family reunion in the outer banks of North Carolina. It's windy, but it hasn't stopped us from spending a lot of time on the beach, being chased by the waves, collecting sea shells and flying kites.

I'm in love with her